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Naughty SMS

Teacher: why are you late?
Student: My dad told me to take our cow to bull.
Teacher(Angrily): Can't your dad to it?
Student: No, only BULL can do it.


I've learned that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. =)


A notice in a factory for girl workers.
"If your skirt is long, protect yourself from machines at work..
If it is short, protect yourself from men at work"


Press down.
down more
deeper
more
YES
ahh
ohh
yes
Almost there!
ooh baby
faster
harder
FEEL GOOD?
mmmm
THAT'S TEXTUAL INTERCOURSE


( ')
/ / in love !
/ /
( ) )
, ( ') engaged
/ , '
( ) )
married
, - - . ( ) )'(, )


What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? Hold on to your nuts.
This is no ordinary blow job!


A man was looking at a painting for a long time of a naked woman with leaves covering the body,
he was asked what he was doing and he answered -
waiting for autumn


A cat tries to get a sausage out of a river, but gets its paws wet, then it see a bigger one but falls in!
MORAL OF STORY? The bigger the sausage the
wetter the pussy!


A cat and a rooster sat by a lake, the cat fell in the lake,
the rooster laughed! LESSON: when there's a wet pussy,
there's a happy cock!


A Sex expert was once asked whether a rape is possible while running.
No, he replied, woman can run faster with her skirt up than a man with his pants
down.




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