Comebacks

Brother: Why do you smell funny?
You: It's called Soap - don't think you've ever smelt it before...


Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a Female Impersonator.


Man: Hey there, haven't I seen you some place before?
Woman: Yes, and that's why I don't go there anymore.



Man: Say, haven't we met before?
Woman: Yes, I'm the head Nurse at the VD clinic.


Man: I can tell that you want me.
Woman: You know, you're dead right...I want you to go away!


Wife: Darling, do you think I'll lose my looks as I get older
You: With luck, yes



Work Colleague: Do you find me entertaining?
You: I reckon you are too dim to entertain a thought


Old Wife: Shall I put the TV on? Old Man: Well it would certainly improve the view in here...


You know, I've been asked to get married over a hundreds times.
Yeah, but your parents don't count...



How many people work in your office?
About half of them